Anger Torpedoes Relationships

Christ stated on multiple occasions that His teaching could be summed up with two things.  Love the Lord your God with all your heart, your soul, and your mind, and love your neighbor as you love yourself.  It is all about relationships.

Anger disrupts our purpose as Christians because it torpedoes relationships.  James 1:19&20 admonishes us, “19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; 20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”  Notice the first two parts of James’ admonishment focuses us on others by being a listener not trying to get the first word in, winning the argument, nor over-powering a person.  Jesus wants us to show compassion and concern for the other person.  We honor Christ when we do.  Then, James cuts us to the core when he declares, be “slow to anger; 20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.  Anger leads to destruction, hurts, bitterness, and violence stunting growth and creating the same tendencies in others.   Proverbs 18:13 speaks to this, “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.”

Proverb 15:1 explains it this way, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”  Anger begats anger!

Ephesians 5: 26&27 says, “do not let the sun go down on your angerand give no opportunity to the devil.”  Don’t stew on angry thoughts.  Passive aggressive people be careful.  Angry thoughts internalized are like tumbling bullets that tear the person apart.  Get rid of these thoughts.  They are cancerous and spread emotional cancer to others

I recognize that many of us grew up in anger ridden households.  Start today getting rid of this stuff.  It won’t be easy.  Anger is a part of your being.  Let Jesus know today that you humbly want to change. 

  • Get into His word, memorize it, and meditate on it.  When you meditate on His Word, you are cycling healing thoughts that will clean up your being.  Do this at home, in your car, while waiting on a client, at the Doctor’s office, etc.  Make this a habit.  There are some wonderful apps on you mobile phone like Bible Gateway.
  • Pray honestly, truthfully, candidly often. 
  • If you are being overpowered by anger, get in a recovery group like Re:Gen or Celebrate Recovery.  There are others like you who are fighting through the same battle. 
  • At least, find a trusted, mature Christian friend(s) who will walk through the journey of healing with you.  James 5:16 states, “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.” 

Take time to be made whole.  Be authentic and patient with the cleanup of rubble caused to others by torpedoes fired from your anger.  Do what needs to be done to restore broken relationships allowing victims time to work things out according to their pace not yours.


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